Your Parenting Plan Can Determine Whether Your Co-Parenting Relationship Will Be Cooperative, Parallel, Or Conflicted

The first time you have an in-depth discussion with your spouse or your divorce lawyer about parenting plans, the focus will probably be on which days the children spend with which parent.  Will either parent have to adjust their work schedule to accommodate their parenting time and transportation?  Will the children need to take different school buses on different days of the week?  While you might be most concerned with the timesharing aspects of the parenting plan, so you can spend quality time with your children during your parenting time and stay busy during your ex’s parenting time so you don’t go crazy missing your kids, the most important parts of the parenting plan do not have to do with time, but with decisions.  Can you and your ex make decisions jointly?  If not, who has the final say?  For help thinking clearly about your co-parenting relationship with your ex and developing an appropriate parenting plan, contact a Birmingham child custody lawyer.

Three Styles of Co-Parenting

According to a recent article on the Newsweek website, even though every family is unique, it is possible to divide co-parenting relationships into three main categories:

• Cooperative co-parenting – The parents are not necessarily friends, but they communicate well about parenting. They keep their interactions KIND (kid-centered, informative, nice, and direct), but they consult each other on major parenting decisions and know each other’s parenting styles well enough that the children can have a consistent set of rules at both houses.
• Parallel parenting – The parents know they cannot get along, so they agree to disagree. They follow the parenting plan, but they stay out of each other’s business.  Sometimes they only talk to each other through their lawyers or through co-parenting apps like Our Family Wizard.  While this scenario may keep the peace, it leads to the kids having two sets of rules and can make it easier for the kids to play the parents against each other.
• Conflicted co-parenting – The parents argue and interfere with each other’s plans about everything. Parenting plans are made to be ignored, except when one parent uses them as fuel in a dispute.  Life is constant chaos and stress for the children and the parents.

It Is Worthwhile to Invest Time in a Parenting Plan That Sets the Right Tone

A parenting plan can go a long way toward peacefully co-parenting with your ex-spouse.  Any ambiguities in the parenting plan leave room for conflict, which could mean occasional stress, in ideal circumstances, and a constant battle in and out of court, in the worst cases.  Before you start working on your parenting plan, have an honest conversation with your lawyer about how your relationship with your ex-spouse is and how you want it to be.

Contact Peeples Law About Setting Yourself Up for Successful Co-Parenting

A Birmingham family law attorney can help you draft a detailed and realistic parenting plan.  Contact Peeples Law today to schedule a consultation.

Source:

msn.com/en-us/lifestyle/parenting/the-3-types-of-co-parenting-and-how-each-impacts-the-kids/ar-BB1pWZT0?ocid=msedgntp&pc=ACTS&cvid=f1c40e0ad75d4c68b5449e90e8b9c93c&ei=45